As senior year went by, I’m sure you’re getting tired of hearing this, but nothing much changed. Until, that is, Sidney got drafted by the Pittsburgh Penguins. When he told me this, I was ecstatic. And then I realized. He was moving to Pittsburgh.
He would never have time for anything other than his team. But I couldn’t ruin this for him, so I did what I thought was best for both of us. “Sidney, I want you to know that I’m not doing this because I want to, but because I think I kind of have to,” I mumbled.
“I don’t think I want to hear this,” he said. “I wish you didn’t have to,” I said, “we can’t do this anymore. I don’t want you to have to choose between me and hockey, so I’m choosing for you. You’re gonna move to Pittsburgh, and you’re gonna show everyone how amazing you are. I don’t want you to have any other commitments besides your career. This is an amazing opportunity, Sid, and I’m not going to let myself ruin it for you.”
He shook his head. “That doesn’t make sense.” “I love you,” I said. “So why do I have to choose between you and hockey? Why can’t I have both?” he asked. “Sidney, once you get to Pittsburgh you’re going to forget all about me. And then…I’m going to get mad at you for that. I just want to do this now, so that we can go our separate ways as friends and not despise each other. Trust me, it’s hard for me too,” I said.
I tried to stop the tears from coming, but they came out anyway. He wrapped his arms around me, and I buried my face in his muscular shoulder. And then without another word, I walked away.
That was the last time I talked to Sidney. Well, for a few years at least. It was the hardest time in my life, to be honest. It wasn’t uncommon for me to go a day or more without even the slightest hint at a smile.
I know, you think I’m a ridiculous whiny baby. But Sidney was my best friend; he was my love. He was…my everything. Since the time I was eight years old, I had been so wrapped up in him that I could barely think about anything else. And that didn’t change after he left.
I still thought about him just as much as I did before, only now I couldn’t see him every day to ease my overworking mind. Not to mention, you couldn’t turn on a radio or TV without hearing his name. I watched every Penguins game, and saw him make the transition into stardom, which I knew was going to happen.
I knew I had done what was best for us. But still, in the back of my mind, I regretted it. We loved each other, maybe we could have made it work. Where I was, he was. I really didn’t have many other friends except him, and the ones I did have got annoyed with me because I never made any time for them.
Honestly, I know this sounds like every other teenager in “love,” but really it was so much more than that. It takes two special people to make something last as long as we had, and there’s no doubt in my mind that it could have been much longer if we wanted it to. Many nights, especially in the first year, I cried myself to sleep. In short, Sidney Crosby was my whole world, and to have that taken away from you…it’s heartbreaking.
No comments:
Post a Comment